Random

I'm 58...

my birthday was yesterday. 58 may seem like a hiccup in the road of birthdays, but for me, it was huge...it is huge. In 61 more days, (on October 12), I'll be the exact age my dad was when he left this earth. He turned 58 on April 12, and died on June 13. I'm having trouble putting into words how this makes me feel...but what I am thinking about is that my dad seemed so much older to me than what I feel now...

but it's the same age.

I watched a beautiful sunset night before last...

a bright orange ball of fire setting on the Pacific Ocean. I recorded the last 2 minutes and 4 seconds of it...the pounding of the waves echoing as it set...

 I've been thinking about sunsets...

and sunrises...

as I drink this cup of coffee...in my dark, quiet house...with my guy sound asleep... a state I never reached last night...

It's 4:30 a.m....

I'm not sure why I struggled to stay in bed and sleep... I tried...I turned this way and that...tried to turn my mind off. I thought I'd succeeded when I was remembering the sunset, but that put me on a whole new path.

Sunsets close out a day, the light goes off for the earth's day...but the earth is still here...it is a time to rest, to refresh, to heal.

God tells me His mercies are new every morning...the sunrise. I'm tempted to get dressed and drive to the beach and watch the sunrise today...but those of you who know where I live will understand that I don't...it's foggy... The sunrise will still happen, a new day will still begin...it'll just be a bit hidden at first...

Joshua and Erica went on a date last night...a 'double date'... I loved hearing him tell me they were going, it made me smile and think about Joshua and all the foggy mornings of years back... and then all I could see was his big smile, I could hear him telling me he missed 'the fam' when he was here... and I could 'see' Erica and Thalia smiling...

I thought about school...I didn't want to think about it, but it kept creeping into my thoughts. How will I do it? I spent yesterday in interviews for a new 5th grade teacher... this new staff member is going to be beyond thrilled when she gets the call next week, offering this job she wants so much... a sunrise for her...I'm sure that's why I couldn't quit thinking about school. I thought about a student I had last year...who I'll have again this year...probably my most difficult student in my career...

I thought about girlfriends...and how they touch my life, how we help each other through rocky times...

 and we watched the sunset together...